We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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