You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize