put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize