fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
