Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
