The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
