the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
