I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize