What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
