so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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