Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
