how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize