Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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