I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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