Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
