I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
