I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
