did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
His hands were made for my vagina.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
