Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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