I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
