I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
