I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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