Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
