i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
