So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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