is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
