Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
