Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize