Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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