Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
