So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
