your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Pants are for mortals
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
