you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
