You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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