I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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