I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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