i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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