I wanna bring you to show and tell
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
