I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
