next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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