Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
