I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
