You made me cry and you don't even care
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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