quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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