i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
