LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
