Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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