yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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