Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
