Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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