I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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