She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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